Definition of a Puma: Pumas are the babies, women in their 20's or 30's, not as experienced as Cougars, they date, fat, balding, rich, older men.
Definition of a Cougar: A woman in her sexual prime in her 40's who prefers to hunt rather than be hunted. A cougar's victims are usually under 30, as cougars prefer to mate with men who still have hair. Cougars generally feed and then continue hunting, as they enjoy role reversal.
Defnition of a Jaguar: a jaguar is 50 and over, Jaguars tend to be financially stable and are only looking for sex from younger men. (Definitions courtesy of UrbanDictionary.com)
Not totally inaccurate, as we do enjoy HRMS (hot retarded monkey sex) with an amazing lover (try to find THAT in a man in their 20's's or 30's...good luck) but we don't want to hunt, not really. We want to be pursued, by a man, NOT a boy. So what do we call ourselves? Women who are divorced/widowed, in their late 40's or early 50's, still hot and exceedingly knowledgeable and passionate, but have spent the last twenty years raising a family and/or pursuing a career and seriously neglected in the passion department. Women who are fit, smart, accomplished and have a sense of humor. How about not labeling ourselves, but simply proclaiming that we are women, and we need to be treated with respect, to be pursued with passion and to be more than a notch on the belt that inevitably holds up the "dunlop" pooch. Speaking of which, waz up wit dat? Show some body integrity guys! Oh, off that soapbox, totally another blog.
During the past few weeks we have contemplated the possibility that we may indeed never find a man that creates in us a feeling of passion, abandon and yes, love. And that's scary. We do not want to be THAT woman, you know, the woman with the cats. So far, we have both found a man/lost a man who has created this sensation of passion and love since we have been divorced, but unfortunately as frequently happens, these men had huge... (yes that too) red flags. One of them was totally devoted, wanted marriage, but refused to grow up emotionally and financially and worst of all, could not "put down the beer." The other, a friend who by the way lived oh, only 3000 miles away, came on like gangbusters in the beginning, but quickly retreated stating he was not yet ready for a relationship and that I was getting "too attached." Funny, wasn't he the one who texted me at all hours of the day and night, and sent me quotes from songs and spiritual books (which meant of course he was deep, right?) Wasn't he the one who held me all night long and told me he had never been this passionate with a woman before? Oh, I guess I should not have come to the conclusion that he cared or wanted anything. Just HRMS without emotion, love or passion. How stupid of me, but much more, how stupid of him.
No, there is not a perfect man or woman out there, this has been established. And each relationship comes into our lives to teach us a lesson. So, we have learned some lessons and we realize that we are alone, even though our lives are full of friends, work, family and fun. But damn, it sure would be fun to share this with another person, someone who is mature, open, is a great lover, has passion and is ready to face the challenge of being in a relationship that is deep and meaningful and of course, is a great lover. (Did we say great lover twice? oops!) Is there anyone out there who would like that? If so, let us know. Because we are not Cougars, not Jaguars, not an animal at all, we are Goddesses.
Definition of a Goddess: a woman who is so beautiful, brilliant, and wholesome that she is simply not like any other woman on Earth and therefore possesses some sort of uncommon spiritual element that while it cannot be solidly defined, is clearly present. Yep, that pretty much says it all.
